yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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