that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
