So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I think people are normalizing furries
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