dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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