I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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