I think i peed on brittanys purse
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Sober January is a disaster.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
