All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
did you just send me my own nude
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize
