u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
