Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I think I won the penis lottery.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Is Oprah even human
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize