it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
