Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
