Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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