No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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