I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
