i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
