Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
