I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
