Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
