You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
