i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
