Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Randomize
