Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
