as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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