I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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