who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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