i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
