I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize