I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
