dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
You're breaking my sexual little heart
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
