You can't special order awesome
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
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