I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Randomize
