No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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