What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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