Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
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