Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
