I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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