was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
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