have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
is wine microwaveable?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
