Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
ok first of all what the fuck
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
