Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
