my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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