thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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