we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
