Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
