Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize