just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
