addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
so let's talk penis.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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