i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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