There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Naked. naked and bneed help.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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