I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
