alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
