god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize