do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
